Far, Farm, Farming

I have been at the F__ d’E__ for about two weeks now and it has been one of the most challenging times of my life, however not physically, as expected.  WWOOFing was an adventure all in itself.  Working on organic farms all around the world in exchange for room and board seemed like a great way to spend sometime in France between my two academic programs, and for anyone or anywhere else, a great way to see the world and experience cultures that might not previously be appreciated.  Coming to the F__d’E__ I had no idea what to expect but I hoped for the best and was willing to put all my muscle effort into pure labor for the work and future of the farm.  Unfortunately the physical aspect of my work at the farm has been overwhelmed by the emotional rollercoaster that every employee and volunteer at the farm seems to be on.  

The farm is in desperate need of money.  The owners, a couple, V_ and her husband bought the farm four years ago and from what I can tell, this is the worst season they have had.  Yesterday I was on a canoeing trip with P_ who works in the vegetable garden.  He and his friends were talking about the financial circumstances of the farm and of V_’s position.  It seems the bank has refused to give V_ and her husband sufficient funds to keep the farm going.  It has become clearer the longer I’ve been here that money is very tight.  Just last Thursday there was barely any food in the refrigerator and V_ kept saying that she couldn’t do the grocery shopping because there just wasn’t enough money.  Friday and Sunday guests of the farm came for a meal that V_ prepared so she was able to earn enough money to buy some groceries for the farm.  While I’m not ignorant about the financial situation of the world at the moment, I think the conditions for this farm do not lie merely on the economic situation of France, or the economic crisis that has trickled across Europe in the past few years.  Unfortunately, the situation is much more difficult and sad than an economic lapse in judgment.  V_ is a woman that has thrown herself into an endeavor to grand for her to even grasp. She has herself in deeper than she even knows, so much that she cannot even see a practical solution, much less those around her who are trying to help.  Everyone that works on the farm is here to help, whether for money or room and board, but the organization and distribution of labor on the farm is so inefficient that it does not allow for the farm to thrive, much less make a profit for the benefit of V_ and the farm.  The animals are here merely for pedagogic reasons, occasionally an old goat or sheep is eaten, but other than that the animals play a role of tourism and unfortunately of absorbing much of the money for the life and vibrancy of the farm.  The apple orchard makes cider and juice in the fall and the gites and summer camps bring in some income, but that doesn’t seem to bring in enough to make the farm stay afloat.  

As for my role, I have tried my best to be as helpful and aware of what is going on at the farm, although at times I feel that my help is not enough for the economic sustainability of the farm.  I am very conscious of helping V_ when I can and providing her with enough questions and commentary to keep her mind off the situation she is in.  However it has been difficult for me emotionally to be on a farm with a financial situation larger than I can fix and with people that are saddened and angry about the conditions of their lives.   As my mom says, I have twenty-seven antennae and thus I absorb and listen to all the conversations and emotions of the people around me.  And while in some situations it can be nice to be aware of all that is going on, here at the F__ d’E__ it has proved to be my weakness.  It is too much to absorb the sentiments and tragedies of the people that work on this farm.  For now, I am trying my best to make the best of everything and in a week I’ll be switching farms and hoping for the best!